I am not gonna care how these words come out. I am one for privacy, but sometimes you need someone or something to vent at. The MIL situation is still ongoing and it is not getting any better. It has been 7 months since the MIL has moved in and I believe she has no intention of ever leaving. It has gotten to the point where I have told my wife that I will leave and go my own separate way if the situation is not handled within a certain time. This shit STRESSES ME OUT. I feel more comfort at work than what I feel at home. I have become a stranger at my own residence.
How did it get to this point?
Lack of progress from MIL, and communication from my MIL and wife. I am an outsider on progress, and often when I approach my wife about the situation, she gets defensive. When I recently talked about this with my wife, I explained that it would be akin to my brother moving in and me not respecting your point of view. Imagine not being able to feel comfortable wearing boy shorts and a shirt with no bra after a long days work. How would you feel? Later on she revealed that the mother has been a major help in cooking, cleaning, etcetera. She is my wife’s personal assistant and my wife loves it. I can’t help my wife the way the MIL can. She says she is reluctant to be the enforcer of my policy because she doesn’t wish to create ill will between her mother and her. She also doesn’t wish to shoulder the load of doing everything by herself.
From the MIL’s point of view, this is an awesome time to be alive. I get to live rent & utility free in a nice city. I’m having an awesome relationship with my grandchild and daughter, while helping my child with her motherly duties. I clean up the house and web surf all day. I am being such a great help for them. If I am making his wife happy, shouldn’t he be happy for his wife.
My POV, is that it is of no benefit to me when I pay the bulk of the rent and work ridiculous amounts of hours, only to come back home where there is no communication of the promised progress that was supposed to be made by MIL. There is no benefit of me not being able to have the same amount of privacy that I once had before. Intimacy has to be muted and I feel like a child in my own house. When you feel like a mute button has been placed over your mouth, and people don’t absorb your words. You become upset.